Tag Archives: family

Hello

Apologies for the lack of updates over the last couple of months. It’s been a crazy busy time around here but I’m mostly still treading water. We’re all a little stressed – and that’s a trigger for worsening poor Lucy’s schizophrenia

The basics are
Samantha has been offered a new job at the other end of the country. After much discussion, she’s accepted it and we’re moving next month down to Cardiff.

Unfortunately, and making packing and moving much harder than anticipated, Samantha has broken her leg. One of the most terrifying phonecalls a man can recieve is one from the hospital saying his wife’s been in an accident. She tripped and fell down the stairs at work, gave herself mild concussion, a couple of cracked ribs and a displaced fracture of her right leg. She’s been struggling post-operation on her leg, groggy with painkillers and looking for something to do other than watch TV and read – she’s a very active woman and being mostly immobile isn’t working for her.  I’ve been spending a lot of time with her, keeping her company

I’m hoping to get caught up reading your posts over the next couple of days or so. Things are getting easier now we’re finding our current rhythm around the house.

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Clothes Shopping

The only problem with losing a substantial amount of weight is that things like my clothes no longer fit. Walking around with ones jeans sliding down is generally seen as A Bad Thing, so Samantha and Lucy decied this afternoon to take me clothes shopping.

Can I just say that this is my idea of HELL.
I would rather spend an afternoon locked in a room with my ex-wife.
I’d rather jump behind enemy lines in an active warzone.

Getting dragged from shop to shop to shop. Try this on, try that on, give us a twirl. The girls treatng me like a toy or a piece of meat. Lather, rinse repeat. Yes, I got some nice new clothes out of it. New jeans, new trousers, new shirts and t-shirts. A new suit for a faculty function that Samantha & I are attending next month. But really whats wrong with going to one shop, why do we have to do it over and over, try everything on. And then go back through to all the same shops to buy the things they’ve decided on?
Maybe it’s a woman thing.

I’m ashamed to admit I got very frustrated with the process, starting acting a little bit like an over-tired toddler, lost my temper and snapped at the girls. To say Samantha was disappointed would be an understatement of earth-shattering proportions. When we got home, there was a full on lecture on appreciating what she was doing for me and how to act in public. There was also a very painful caning, a ‘time out’ spent standing in the corner and, as if that wasn’t enough, no sex for the rest of the month – no masturbation, no orgasm. Nothing.

My own fault, admittedly, and I don’t think I’m going to be sitting down for a while either!

Apologising For Being A Man

I’ve come to realise as I’m reading blogs that I seem to spend a lot of time feeling the need to apologise for my fellow man, for the way so many men treat women, for the way so many women have been treated by men. It sickens me that there are men who think it’s ok to continue making advances on a woman when shes made it clear she’s not interested, and more than that.

Am I trying to say that I’m perfect, that I’ve never undressed a woman with my eyes, that I’ve never catcalled, that I’ve never thought of certain more manual labour as a ‘mans job’?
No, of course I’m not. I do, however, know where the line is and not to cross it. I was raised by a strong woman and taught to respect women. To respect everyone, lets face it. To be a decent human being.

My son has been raised the same way and if I was to ever find out that he was treating women in a disrepectful manner, if I ever found out he’d broken a woman’s consent… well let’s just say he may be 30 but he’d still find his hide tanned for it!
(I tried to put a joking ‘other than his mother, he can treat her however he pleases’ but actually, no, despite my thinking shes an insufferable bitch, if I found out Charlie was treating his mother wrong it would still be the same case!)

I was always aware of the difficulties a woman can face. My wife struggles with gender bias a lot in her chosen fields. There is a colleague of hers who refers to her, even in earshot, as ‘the cute blonde’ – ok, I’m not going to argue with his assessment because she <b>i</b> but damnit they’re supposed to be professionals, they’re peers, she has just as many (if not more) qualifications as he does, she’s published more, I’d like to say she’s better respected.

Samantha says it’s professonal jealousy combined with a masculine pride and not wanting to believe a woman could do better than her. I say it’s a good job I don’t have to see the arrogant fool more than once or twice a year. I’m personally not sure how she hasn’t broken his nose yet!

I also understnd that would cause more trouble than it’s worth and he’d just label her another emotional woman who can’t control or handle herself.

I cannot understand men like him. I cannot understand the behaviour of so many men.

How are we in 2017 and still struggling with the same issues of gender equality?

A dubious award

According to a small child in town today, I am the coolest old person they had ever seen. Possibly even the coolest old person, ever. Old people, you see, don’t wear Batman t-shirts. This is what I’ve learned today.

While I’m pleased as punch to be classed as cool, I’m not sure how I feel at being seen as an ‘old person’. Yes, I am old and yes I call myself old. But having someone else call me old is very different to knowing I’m old.
I’m not sure how much sense that makes.

Can I just take the ‘cool’ and run with it?
No-one’s ever actually called me cool and meant it before

Samantha and Lucy, who I was having lunch with at the time, thought it was utterly hilarious. They say that I’m just old and not cool though. One day they’ll both turn old, have people think they’re old and then we’ll see how they feel!

Things Jack learned about himself this last week – he does not like to be alone and gets lonely quite easily.

It’s been a weird old week with Lucy at her sister’s and Samantha at work. Samantha’s gone again today – to bring Lucy home – and they’ll be back later this afternoon and I am at a loss of things to do. The house is quiet and empty. I’ve not enjoyed rattling around it in on my own all week and I don’t know how Lucy did it all day, every day.

I ended up spending the latter half of the week out – at the library or at a coffee shop mostly… anywhere where there was human contact to be had. I thought about looking into volunteering opportunities. I may even have snuck into one or two of Samantha’s classes.

I always knew I was an extrovert and thrived on the company of other people but I had no idea how miserable it would make me to be on my own. I hope this is not an experience to be repeated anytime soon!

25 Questions

It’s a little before 6am on a Sunday morning, I’m full of cold, home alone and wide awake. The wide awake is mostly a combination of an empty bed and not breathing – but the home alone/empty bed is no related to having a cold.

Lucy’s sister Susan went into labour early, two beautiful girls born late Friday night. Amelia and Olivia (Millie and Vivi). Small but healthy as expected for being born 2 months early. Samantha has taken Lucy to be with them and will be back later this morning.

I’m killing the sleepless hours online and came across this 25 Questions survey posted by Life Of A Chickpea. Answering and sharing it seemed like a good idea.

1. Do you sleep with your closet doors open or closed? Closed. Leave them open and it’ll cast weird shadows and freak the dog out, or one of the cats will get in there.
2. What is the last thing you downloaded onto your computer? Bullet journal layout idea
3. Do you sing in the shower? Yes I do. This morning the girls were very entertained by my rendition of Time To Say Goodbye
4. What inspires you? Passion
5. Would you bungee jump? ‘Would’? I have and it was great fun
6. Do you have any pets? We have four right now – two cats and two dogs. Samantha would have horses if she could/we had the land and I know Lucy wants rabbits so this may change
7. What book are you reading? Dan Brown – The Lost Symbol
8. Last book you read? Dan Brown – The Da Vinci Code. Jack re-reads Robert Landgon 2017
9. Are you a sports fan? Yes. I support Manchester City and my local team in football. I also enjoy rugby, ice hockey and formula 1 racing
10. Last Person You Talked To On The Phone? Samantha
11. Favourite foods? Roast beef, yorkshire pudding, roast potatoes, parsnip, broccoli, peas, carrots, mustard and gravy.
12. Mountain Hideaway or Beach House? Can I have a place on the beach with the mountains behind it? No? Oh just the beach house then
13. Last thing you listened to? Strauss – The Blue Danube
14. Growing up, which were you favourite cartoons? Oh God. Woody Woodpecker, The Flintstones, Yogi Bear, The Jetsons… I was a big Hanna Barbera fan
15. What are you listening to now? Birdsong from the garden
16. Relationship Status? In a committed poly triad
17. Biggest Fear? Losing my mind
18. Dream destination? I would love to experience Las Vegas
19. Are you in school? If so what are you studying? I’m thinking of taking some online classes in psychology
20. What is your favourite song at the moment? I don’t think I have a favourite per se. Bring Him Home from Les Miserables has been rattling around inside my skull recently.
21. Favourite Movie? Star Wars
22. Favourite color? Green.
23. Where do you want to be in 5 years? Alive
24. Batman or superman? Yes.
25. Who is your favourite villain? There’s so many good ones to chose from. Darth Vader, The Joker, Hal 9000, Voldemort, Moriarty, Red Skull, Loki, Ra’s Al Ghul, Magneto, Lex Luthor…

Write What You Love

Thank you everyone for your tips and advice on my last post. I definitely found it helpful, and if anything it just reaffirmed what I already suspected.

Write from the heart, write about what I want to write about, write about whatever is in my head, write about what interests me, write about what makes me happy, write about my life.

So what does that mean? what interests me and makes me happy?

My wife and girlfriend. Polyamory. My son. Books I read, music I listen to, movies/tv I watch. Science fiction. Superheroes (Marvel and DC). Football. Fishing. Gardening. Astronomy. BDSM.

I’m not completely sure how any of these are going to translate into posts but I’ve also been told to not think so hard about, just ‘put pen to paper’ and ‘dont expect perfection on page 1’

All food for thought and I’m interested to see how it all plays out

I have however been working on the title for this thing. Instead of being a bland Jack’s Journal, I’ve now got a name of Flying To The Stars:Adventures in Space, Time, Polyamory, and Fishing which I really do like. I’ve also got a layout that I’m much happier with.

One step at a time. Perfect won’t happen on page 1.